Restricting Affections
What we desire directs our decisions. There’s no getting around it. Like a fly circling the light, we move towards what our heart’s want. This isn’t a bad thing either, it’s how we were made. This reality means we need to be all the more aware of where our affections lie.
I was reading in 2 Corinthians this morning and came across an interesting verse. Paul is writing to the church in Corinth. He’s trying to clean up their religiosity and point them towards a life after Jesus.
In Chapter six, Paul says this, “You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections” (2 Corinthians 6:12). His words struck me. What we affect after has the potential to bring restriction to our lives. Chasing our desires can be the very thing that keeps us from growing and maturing.
There’s a bit of culture that needs to be weeded out of us when we begin the conversation around pursuing desire. See, our culture wants to tell us that if you have a desire, you must pursue it – it’s what you were made for. That sounds decent, but upon further inspection these words are incredibly dangerous.
There’s only one question to bring this house of cards down – what if the thing I’m desiring is not ultimately good for me? I could desire candy for all three meals, but that is going to produce diabetes, obesity, and a multitude of health issues.
That being an elementary example, there’s a long list of desires that resemble the products of Paul’s sinful nature list, “sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of aner, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these” (Galatians 5:19-21a).
This non-exhaustive list represents what happens as a result of the works of the flesh or our sinful nature. Again, Paul says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” (Romans 12:2).
A last verse from Proverbs, “Guard your hearts above all else for it determines the course of your life” (Proverbs 4:23). Here’s the rub, we need to be attentive and aware as to what our hearts are fixating towards, because we’re wired to pursue. Do you know what your heart is after?
This is not a time for Sunday school answers, that’ll only keep the blinds over your eyes. This is a time for real, honest self-reflection. Once you have some things written down, know this, your desires are not fixed. In the same way our brains, through neuroplasticity, are malleable, our desires can be turned and shaped through awareness and self-control.
We will have competing desires in this life. There are a million different things you could pursue every morning. There is ultimately a leading indicator as to why you work the job you work, participate in this or that community, and spend your time the way you do.
The question really becomes, what’s your why? Your why informs your what. If you’re having a hard time nailing down what your desires are, work backwards. Look at the “what’s” that you do in a given day or week and ask yourself why do you do those things. You may need to ask the “why” three or four times in order to dig deep underneath the layers.
Give it a try. See what you find. Do not be discouraged if you don’t like what you see initially. That’s incredible news, because now you can make a change. God is so gracious in that He walks with us and does not force us to do anything. He does, however, have specific intentions for you and I. He desires that we know Him and live our lives according to His purposes because that’s what we were ultimately made for.
